The Doctor Who number two finds the Tardis is running a bit sluggish through a sticky patch of the universe, probably due to another problem with the fluid link, and so he leaves it to get checked over at the Garage of the Damned. Without his magical machine, the Doctor Who decides to take the London Underground to pop over to the Powell Estate and see if Rose Tyler has been born yet (she hasn't). Unfortunately he takes the Northern Line and so the journey is a complete nightmare, nothing new there then, due to stuck points, lack of staff, bodies on the line, faulty lights and other nonsense. The Fat Controller fears a mutiny from the passengers but the Doctor Who offers to trick them by using his thick fur coat to pretend to be a monster that has invaded the tunnels. Unfortunately they forget to tell Quatermass who calls out Colonel Lethbridge-Stewart and the popular beat combo Unit 4+2 to tackle the "monster". Lethbridge-Stewart is about to give the Doctor Who a piece of his mind when he discovers that Sgt Bent, part of the episode's "agenda", is acting the fool and pretending to be a monster too. The Doctor Who bids them a fond farewell, shouts "Run" and escapes to another adventure.
Archivist: Suthers
Monstrously deformed, 
Half human, half lost library and half automaton, 
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