His patience sorely tested over the continued unreliability of the fluid link, the Doctor Who (5) steers the Tardis past the fishmongers, costermongers and rumourmongers to stop off at the ironmongers, or hardware store, to see if he can pick up a new one. He finds the place has been taken over by an evil snake and Kate O'Mara. Hilarity ensues as the Doctor Who attempts to purchase some fork handles, letters "o", peas and bathroom plugs. He endures the deadly fiends' attempt at comedy drama with The Wirrn That Turned, but leaves after feeling short-changed in the slapstick department. Head in hands, the Doctor Who wails "There should have been another 'wahey!'."
Archivist: Suthers
Monstrously deformed, 
Half human, half lost library and half automaton, 
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